Submitting

I have been doing a lot of Bible study lately, and I mean a lot.  It is about the only book I read, other than good books by Beth Moore or Lysa Terkeurst.  These are not the only good authors out there, they just happen to have books and Bible studies that I am currently or have done recently.  Right now my daughter and I are going through "A Confident Heart" by Renee Swope.  It is dealing with things I have been thinking about for a while.  Now if I would just hit the parts that make me want to lay prostrate on the floor praying while at home instead of work that would be awesome.  Not that it would be a bad thing, it is just hard to pray that sincerely when people interrupt you.

It seems lately that how I (referring to posture) pray is becoming more important as I work through things with God.  Beth Moore touched on it a little in the last study of hers I did.  I know we can pray any where, any way we want.  God likes it when we talk to Him.  But, I have been feeling led to take it deeper, a more submissive posture.  I noticed a few months ago that when I actually kneel to pray my day goes better.  Does God hear me more clearly in that position?  No.  I think it is my attitude.  I am coming before my LORD and Saviour in a humble attitude, one of submitting to His will.  Have you ever tried it?  How does it work for you if you have?

Another posture, which I have not yet done, is prostrate on the floor.  That is very humbling.  Why haven't I done it?  I feel like that is what I need to do.  I believe that in my quest for a closer relationship with  Jesus I really need to humble myself and submit fully.  But, I come up with a million excuses like, I haven't swept the floor yet today (I have dogs, eww), I'm at work, I don't have time.  Yet if I am truly submitting to His will, like a servant of yore, I would be face down in the dirt if I were to come in to my LORD's presence.  I think I just have not been willing to submit yet.

Submission, what a dirty word.  Who really wants to submit, put ourselves in a subservient manner or attitude.  I don't know about you, but I don't want anyone telling me what to do or how to live, Lording it over me.  I want to be top dog who is submitted to.  That is not how it works with God, who is sovereign.  Plus, I really want THAT relationship, that closeness.  I'm craving it.

I read today in "A Confident Heart" (Renee Swope), "Salvation is a one-time decision, but finding satisfaction in Christ and living in the security of His promises is daily process".  I have been questioning my salvation lately.  Wondering why if I am saved do I not have a closer relationship with Jesus.  Why do I feel the way I do.  I know I have given my life to Him.  I remember the day.  But, still, somehow I feel empty and alone.  I keep searching for things to make me happy.  Swope's statement opened my eyes to what I am missing.  Jesus needs to be my satisfaction and I need to commit to that daily and live and believe His promises.

I am excited to be on this journey of developing a closer, more meaningful relationship with Jesus.  He loves me, He died for me, He rose for me.  He has done so much for me, AND you.  That kind of love is unfathomable.  The closest I can come to it is the love I have for my children and my grandson.  A love that would do anything in my power to protect them, care for them, yes, even die for them.  But I am fallible and can't always live up to my love, not like Jesus did.

I am so thankful for what He did and that He is faithful to pursue me and  you to the ends of the earth to have a deep relationship with us.  As with all relationships for us mere mortals, it takes work and submitting to His will rather than our own.

Father,
I praise Your Holy Name.  I thank You for sending Your precious Son to die on the cross for my sins. Thank You for the borrowed tomb He was buried in.  Thank You for raising Him from the dead.  Thank You for seeing what He did for me, and not what I do or don't do that displeases You.  Father, I ask for strength in my weakness to submit to Your will and draw closer to You.

In Jesus Name,
Amen